Love Through Pain Read online

  Her breathing slowed, and she eventually went back to sleep. In her dreams, she relived the attacks, but his voice would soothe her every time.

  ***

  “No!” Jazmine screamed, jerking awake again. She glanced at her surroundings and realized she was safe. She calmed down—remembering the man who’d helped her when no one else would. He brought her to his mother’s house, and they took care of her. Her vision blurred as she inspected the room; there was a flag with one star hanging by the window, but she was unsure of its representation because blobs of colors were all she could make out. Items she thought could be cars, or trophies, and pictures, sat on the bookshelves to her right.

  Something touched her hand, making her pull back. When she looked over to her left, she blinked several times and managed to see two light brown irises. A child, and he just smiled at her.

  It was a little boy with curly brown hair; he must’ve been around five years old. His elbows sunk into the mattress, and he just stared at her. “Hi.” The child grinned.

  It was painful as she tried to return the gesture. “He-llo…”

  “Why are you in my uncle’s bedroom? Who are you? Why is your face swollen—” He asked her about ten questions in less than thirty seconds. “Tio doesn’t live here, but he doesn’t like strangers in his room.” He politely finished, placing his chin in his hands.

  “Carlitos, where are you?” She heard a female voice yelling.

  He sighed, “Shhh.” And then put his index finger over his mouth before giggling.

  There was a soft knock on the door, and then someone opened it. Jazmine could see the look of surprise in the girl’s eyes when she saw her face.

  She glared over at the child. “Carlitos, I told you not to come in here.” The teenage girl scolded him. “Miss, I’m sorry he bothered you.” She grabbed his wrist and lugged him toward her.

  “He’s okay.” Jazmine scooted up. Pain ripped through her belly.

  “I just wanted to say hi to Tio’s new girlfriend, but Monica is prettier.” The boy said, trying to escape her grip.

  “That’s not his girlfriend.”

  Jazmine wondered if the boy was her brother, they resembled each other. They had the same eyes. She was tall and skinny with freckles.

  “What happened to her face? Did Uncle Javy hit her?”

  “Carlito, Javy would never hit a woman.” The girl raised her voice at him.

  “Grandma said, I need to treat girls like princesses if I want them to treat me like a prince.” He watched her sympathetically. “I hope you feel better.” Carlitos left the room.

  “My name is Lucy and that was my terrible nephew, Carlitos.” She put her hand on the door, but before she exited, she turned around. “Do you need anything?”

  “No, thank you.” It was getting easier to speak.

  “If you do, just yell my name and I’ll come. My brother stepped out to get his truck, but he’ll be right back.” She spun on her heel and followed the route her nephew had taken.

  ***

  Maria, Javier’s mother, came running into the room and rushed over to her. “Sweetie, it was just a dream.”

  Jazmine didn’t realize she was still screaming.

  Maria sat on the bed and gently scooped her into her arms. “It’s okay, he can’t hurt you.” She shuddered.

  “I … tried… I tried to fight them off, but they were too … strong,” she hiccupped between cries.

  Maria leaned away from her. “They?”

  Jazmine wiped her tears with the sheets. “Two … two … men… They took turns attacking me.” She couldn’t contain the wails that fell from her lips. Pain had become her constant companion.

  “Dios mío.” His mom circled her arms around her. “Jazmine you need to report them.”

  “I can’t.”

  “Why?”

  “It was my fault. I should have fought harder.” She placed her hands on the mattress and sat up. “I should’ve waited for my co-workers?”

  Maria cupped her face. “What happened wasn’t your fault. Those men who did this are cowards. What if they do it to someone else? You can help another woman.”

  She slowly pulled away, and gently placed her feet on the floor.

  “Where are you going?” Maria helped her up.

  “I’m going to the police station.” She held onto her. “I was in shock last night—I couldn’t believe this happened to me, but I’m not a weak woman. They’re going to pay for what they did to me.”

  “I’ll go with you.”

  “Can you please take me to my hotel room first. I need to change.” She stared down at the T-shirt and boxers she had on.

  “Hotel, you don’t live here?” Maria asked with surprise.

  “No, I’m here on business. My co-workers have to be worried about me.” She looked around the room. “My purse?”

  “It’s downstairs. Stay right here, sweetie.” Maria opened the door and yelled, “Javy!”

  There was no answer, and she yelled again. “Javier Alexander Martinez!”

  “Coming!” She assumed it was Javier yelling back.

  Maria moved out of the way as her son entered the room.

  Her eyes were still swollen, but she could see much better. Javier had to be about six feet two inches tall. He was lean and muscular, he must’ve been the person who’d carried her last night.

  “Javier, help her down the stairs,” his mom told him.

  His hazel eyes with a hint of blue were a startling contrast to his olive skin. He stared at her face, and she could see the pity in his eyes.

  “Maria it’s okay.” Jazmine tried to move. “I can make it.” She took a step and stumbled.

  “I got you.” He stepped forward and wrapped his hand around her elbow.

  It was him last night, his voice, his words. He made her feel safe, promising not to leave her. He stayed with her through the night. He bent down and put his arm around her waist and the other under her knees, picking her up.

  She placed her hands around his neck and inhaled his fresh cologne.

  “We’re taking her to the hospital.” His mother walked over to the door.

  “I have to change.”

  His mom opened the door wider. “Mamita, you have to get examined first. What you have on doesn’t matter.”

  They walked out of the room, and his mother stepped back in and returned with her ripped up clothes in a bag. “This is evidence, those cabrones are going pay for what they did to you.” She headed down the stairs ahead of them.

  Javier slowly carried her down the steps into the living room, and then placed her on the sofa.

  Jazmine scooted up and that’s when she saw her purse, grabbed it, and dug inside for her cell. She pulled it out, looking at all her missed calls. There would be messages from her co-workers and family.

  “Ma, what did you just say?” Javier gave his mom an inquisitive stare.

  Maria stared at Jazmine, and then at her son.

  Jazmine swiped her cell to life and made a call.

  “Jazmine, oh God, are you okay?” Connie, her co-worker and friend, asked. “Where are you?”

  “I’m okay. I just had a long night.” She tried to answer in a normal voice.

  “You said you were leaving because you needed your rest.”

  “Connie, I’m okay.” She squeezed her eyes shut.

  “You missed the conference. You do know we leave in an hour?” She could hear the annoyance in her friend’s voice.

  She swallowed. “You guys go ahead without me, I won’t make the flight. I’ll be there later this week.”

  “Jazmine, this isn’t like you. Are you sure you’re okay?” Now concern colored Connie’s tone.

  “I said I’m okay.” Her voice cracked as she raised it, making Javier and his mother look back.

  “I apologize.”

  “I’m sorry, Connie. I have some things I need to wrap up here, so can you please tell the others I’m fine, and I’ll see them sometime next week
.”

  “Okay Jazmine.” Her friend sighed. “I have to ask one more time—are you okay?”

  “Yes.” She slid the phone off and placed it back into her purse.

  “Jazmine.”

  She turned when she heard her name, and Javier stared at her.

  “What did my mother mean when she said those—was it more than one guy?” His jaw clenched.

  She took a deep breath. “Yes.”

  Chapter Three

  Maria took charge as soon as they reached the hospital. She explained to both the doctor’s and police that they didn’t wash any evidence off of her body, and that she’d only patched up the cuts on her face.

  “Maria, can you please stay with me?” Jazmine tried not to let her fear bleed through the question.

  “I wouldn’t think of leaving you.” Maria kept an arm around Jazmine as she shuffled along behind the nurse to a private room.

  The nurse asked her general questions about her health. Her tone crisp, she kept her gaze on the clipboard. “When was your last menstrual cycle?”

  “The fifth of this month,” Jazmine answered calmly.

  She took note. “Are you on birth control?”

  “Yes.”

  Maria gently squeezed her hand.

  “I’m going to get the doctor, and I need your consent to take pictures of the evidence.” The nurse handed Jazmine a document and a pen.

  Jazmine took it, read it, and signed, handing it back. “I’ll be right back.” The RN exited the room.

  “I can do this,” Jazmine whispered.

  “Honey, yes you can. I’ll be right by your side.” Maria bowed her head. “Let’s pray.”

  Jazmine was angry and didn’t feel like praying. How could God allow them to attack her? But she still bowed her head and closed her eyes.

  “Padre nuestro que estas en los cielos….” Maria’s tears rolled down her freckled cheeks as she grasped her hands. “Amen.” She opened her eyes, and wiped her tears. “He will give you strength.”

  “Maria, thank you for everything.” She squeezed Maria’s hand, getting emotional, thinking of how hopeless she felt.

  “No thanks necessary.”

  The doctor entered the room with the nurse directly behind him. She held a camera in her hands.

  “Miss O’Neal, I’m Doctor Arnold,” he introduced himself and took his time gently telling her about all of the exams he would be performing. They took pictures of her cuts and bruises, and then finally did a pelvic exam, where they took a sample.

  They scraped under her fingernails and took the sealed bag of clothing from Maria.

  Tears rolled down Jazmine’s cheeks. She was embarrassed and ashamed. How could she let this happen? She questioned herself over and over.

  The doctor wrote his findings on the report, which the RN had been scribbling on earlier.

  “Miss O’Neal, this was not your fault,” the doctor said, holding the clipboard. “You did the right thing, coming here. The police officers will be interviewing you next.”

  “Okay.” She closed her eyes.

  “I’m going to step out for a minute. I need to make a phone call.” Maria squeezed her hand.

  ***

  “Javier, can you sit with Jazmine? I have to call your father.” His dad was a truck driver, always on the road.

  With no sleep in over two days, Javier’s lids felt gritty every time he blinked. He was used to not getting much rest. When he was deployed in Afghanistan he had to keep vigilant, day and night, with little or no sleep at all. His memories hit him like a ton of bricks. Senior Chief Valle screamed for help, but he was stuck beneath the hot heavy metal from the explosive. He remembered thinking, if they would see another day—he wondered if Jazmine felt the same way when those assholes were attacking her. He pushed off the arms of the chair to rise and trooped over to her room door, easing it open. Her eyes were closed. He dragged a chair closer to the side of the bed and sat next to her. “Jazmine, are you okay?”

  She opened her brown eyes and glared at him. “No, I’m not fucking okay!” she screamed. “I was raped!” Tears began rolling down her face.

  He was at a loss on how to handle the despondent woman. She wasn’t mad at him, she was just lashing out. He told himself he would take it—if that’s what she needed—he’d be her punching bag.

  She wiped at her face, and then surprised him when she reached out and took his hand. “Javier, I’m so sorry… You helped me. I shouldn’t take it out on you. ”

  He offered her a smile. “It’s okay. If you need to take it out on me, I’m right here.”

  There was a knock on the door. “Come in.” Javier straightened in the chair.

  Two police officers entered her room and explained the process.

  “Some of the questions may be difficult for you to answer, but we need to know.” The female officer glanced up and offered a gentle smile.

  His mother opened the door. Javier stood to leave, but Jazmine gripped his hand tighter.

  “Don’t go.” He saw panic in her eyes as she clutched him. He sat, his back ramrod straight, not wanting to hear about the attack, but she needed him.

  His mom silently stepped out and closed the door.

  “Can you describe your attacker?” The female cop asked.

  “It was two of them.”

  “Two?” She began writing in her report.

  “They were both white I think.” Jazmine shut her lids, and when the memories came flooding, she hastily opened her eyes.

  “You think?” The male cop asked.

  “They were saying racial slurs, I ignored them. So I assumed they were both white. I know for sure one of them was. I’m just not sure about the other one.” She paused, and he thought she might have been trying to get her thoughts together.

  “The first guy that approached me was maybe six feet tall, short brown hair, brown-grayish eyes, and I remember he had a tattoo on his left arm, right under his sleeve, it looked like a snake. His nose looked like it had been broken,” she paused before continuing with her description. “The other asshole was about five feet nine, maybe, I’m really not sure. He had blonde hair, mustache, long nose, and small eyes.”

  “What color were his eyes?”

  “Blue, I remember how empty they looked when he struck me.” Her nose flared.

  “What happened?”

  Javier rubbed her hand with his thumb. “I’m here.”

  “I left the Rouse Lounge, because I had an early morning conference.” She rubbed her forehead with her other hand.

  “By yourself?” the male officer pitched in with a snort.

  “Yes, I wanted to leave, and my friends didn’t, so yes, I was alone.” She now glared at the male officer.

  “What did you have on?” He observed her.

  “What does that matter?” the female cop asked, putting down her pen, now shooting daggers at the male officer. Her eyes became soft when she turned to Jazmine. “Miss O’Neal, you don’t have to answer that question.”

  “No it’s okay.” She stared at the male cop. “I had on a conservative black and white dress. If you don’t believe me, the doctor has the ripped up evidence in a fucking bag.” Tears brimmed beneath her lids, blurring her vision.

  Javier rose, cupped her face in his hands, and stared into her eyes. “Jazmine, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

  “Sir, we’re going to have to ask you to be quiet or you’ll have to leave,” the male cop stated.

  He could feel his jaw tighten as he released her face and took a seat on the edge of her mattress.

  “You’re making her feel like she did something wrong,” he commented, his voice stern. “Why would you ask her what she had on? Does it fucking matter?” Javier glared at the male cop.

  The policeman went to answer, but his partner cut him off. “Sir, I’ll be asking the questions from here on out,” his female partner interceded. “Continue, ma’am.”

  Jazmine took a deep breath, and then closed her eyes
again.

  “I parked my rental on the street behind the club, because there was no parking. I didn’t want to walk all the way around, so I decided to cut through the alley. Just before I turned, three men approached me.” She wiped her cheeks. “They started speaking to me, telling me how beautiful I was, and then one of them asked if I would go home with him. I ignored him and kept walking. I didn’t notice that two of them followed me until one of them said, ‘Bitch, you think you’re too good for us?’ They called me other degrading names, I don’t wish to repeat. I kept walking faster, and one of them grabbed my arm. When I turned around, I slapped him, and told him to take his fucking hands off of me. That’s when he punched me in the face, and I fell to the ground. The other guy pulled me up, and I fought back with everything in me, but it was two of them against me.” She continued telling them everything that happened as she relived it.

  She could feel their hands on her; one guy was behind her holding her mouth while the other ripped her dress, calling her a cunt, and punching her. She tried to scream, she fought but they were stronger. He punched her, calling her names, while the other whispered in her ear you know you black girls like it rough. They threw her on the ground, and the taller one tore her panties off. She fought until she had no strength left. Every time she kicked, he punched her stomach. One pinned her hands down with his legs, while covering her mouth, and settled in between her legs and raped her with no mercy. There were no more tears to cry, she gave up. They laughed while they took turns raping her, and after they were done, they continued to beat her.

  Jazmine started shaking. Javier forgot about not touching her, and he wrapped his arms around her. “It’s okay, they can’t hurt you anymore.”

  She trembled uncontrollably against his side. He kissed her temple. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.” A tear escaped his eyes. He had never showed emotion in front of anyone, but this was hard to stomach—as she told the events, he lived it with her.