Barely Breathing Read online

“What did you need to tell us?” Kay asked.

  She couldn’t meet their eyes. “First, I want to say thank you for all you’ve done for Cara and me.”

  Kay grabbed her hand. “Are you saying goodbye?”

  She finally looked up at her. “No, not yet, but we’re leaving soon, and please don’t try to convince me to stay.” She watched Cara and Angel play.

  “But Sophia, you’ve made a home for yourself here,” Jason said. “Why?” He gave her a suspicious glare.

  “I told Kay months ago that I was leaving, but she convinced me to stay a little longer.” She turned to her. “Kay, you knew this was going to happen, and it’s best for everyone involved.” Playing with her fingers, she watched her two friends.

  “What do you mean?” Kay asked.

  “I didn’t mean to put the two of you in this position, but you’re going to find out soon, and I think it’s best if you find out from me first.”

  Kay arched a brow, and Jason leaned back in the chair.

  “I did something stupid.” She took a deep breath.

  “What did you do?” Kay observed her. “Are you okay?”

  Jason didn’t say anything. It was as though he already knew.

  Kay looked over at Jason, and saw that he didn’t seem surprised. “What happened? Jason, what’s going on?”

  He didn’t answer his wife.

  “I slept with John,” she blurted out.

  Kay looked at her in surprise. “Amy’s John? Jason’s best friend John?” she asked her voice rising.

  “Yes.”

  “You fucking slept with a married man, my friend’s husband. I asked you if you were having an affair with him and you said no.” Kay stood and started pacing. “I told Amy there was nothing going on with you two.”

  “Kay, you don’t understand.”

  “No, I don’t understand how a woman like you would do this.”

  Jason stood, and stopped her from pacing. “Kay, you’re not being fair right now. You haven’t even heard her out.”

  Kay glared at him. “He told you, and you didn’t tell me. She’s my best friend, Jason.”

  “John did tell me, and no I didn’t tell you because it wasn’t my secret to tell,” Jason said, now getting upset. “This secret had nothing to do with our relationship.”

  “It does.” She crossed her hands over her chest.

  “I have never asked you about the secret you and Sophia have, because I trust you.”

  Sophia got up. “Don’t get upset with Jason.”

  “Don’t tell me how to feel.”

  “Kay!” Jason grabbed her arms. “They found comfort in each other when they were in pain. I remember two friends years ago, who turned to each other.” He stared at her. “Who are we to judge?”

  Kay’s eyes softened and looked over at her.

  “Calm down and talk to her.” He kissed her cheek and walked toward the back of the house with the kids.

  “Sophia, why didn’t you talk to me?”

  “Did you see the way you just acted?” She sat. “I know I put you in a predicament.”

  “I knew something was wrong.” Kay sat as well, and took her hand in hers. “I’m sorry, Sophia. I know you better than anybody.”

  “We didn’t set out to hurt anyone. We thought we were dying and we wanted to forget, and then he became my shoulder to lean on.” Her eyes watered.

  “I saw the way he looked at you. Are you sure there’s nothing more?”

  “That’s why I’m leaving.” A tear dropped, she finally admitted to herself that she was falling in love with him. “I don’t want to cause their marriage or him any more pain.”

  “Amy took care of that detail without your help. You don’t have to leave.”

  “You knew I was planning on leaving anyway. This just pushed it up.”

  Kay squeezed her hand. “Did he tell her?”

  “I don’t know if he told her yet, but I know him. He’ll tell her the truth.”

  They got up and hugged each other. “I’m going to miss you.”

  “Me too.”

  Chapter Twenty

  John entered their home and Amy was sitting in the living room watching TV with their son, acting like she’d never left. The secretary at the school had called and told him that Amy came to visit their son, but when she went to leave he started crying wanting to leave with her, against his better judgment he let her take him home.

  “Daddy!” Johnny jumped off her lap and ran to him.

  He bent down to pick him up. “How’s my boy?”

  “Mommy’s back, Daddy,” he said, getting down. “Tomorrow is Saturday. Are we going to see Sophie and Cara?”

  “No,” Johnny’s smile faded, but he was silent.

  Amy stared at him, and crossed her hands over her chest. “Why is my son asking for her?”

  John ignored her and entered the kitchen with Johnny right behind him. “I’m hungry, Daddy.”

  “You didn’t eat yet?”

  “No. Can I have a cheese hotdog and chips?” Johnny asked, sitting at the table, waiting for him. He quickly fixed him a hot dog with chips and gave him a juice box. Then he walked back to the living room, where Amy was still sitting in the same position.

  “You didn’t feed him?” He took off his jacket.

  “I didn’t know he was hungry.”

  He glared at her. “He’s a kid. It’s after six.”

  “I thought you would be home early, since I’m back.”

  “I don’t live here anymore. I’m staying at my Condo.”

  “Why?”

  “Because this is your home, and we needed change.”

  “We bought this house together.” She ignored his last answer. “What’s fucking going on between you and that bitch?” She got up.

  “Watch your mouth. Johnny’s here,” he snapped, loosening his tie.

  “Are you fucking her?” He moved to their bedroom, and she followed him. “Are you fucking her?” she yelled.

  Getting angry, he turned to face her. “You have some nerve, after all the dirt you did to me. You don’t even deserve to ask me shit.”

  Her mouth formed an O. “So this is pay back.”

  “You want the truth? Here’s the truth, Amy. When I needed you the most you weren’t here, but she was. She took care of your son when he was sick and needed his mother. She was here when my father died. Where the fuck were you?”

  “I was sick, John. I was getting help,” she shouted, “and you were here fucking that black bitch.” She sighed. “How could you cheat on me?”

  He chuckled. “You didn’t have a problem cheating on me with God knows who, but you came up with some good excuses.”

  “You don’t believe me?”

  “No, Amy, I don’t believe you.”

  She started crying. “I had a problem, John, and I’m dealing with it.”

  “It took you seven fucking months to fix your problem?” He smirked, and she didn’t say anything. “I thought so. Most rehab don’t last seven months.”

  “Please give us another chance. If not for us, for Johnny.”

  He leaned against the door. “I slept with Sophia.”

  “Why?” She really broke down, crying. “John, how could you?”

  He couldn’t stand seeing her like this.

  “I know I deserve this, but why with her?”

  “We didn’t mean to hurt anyone. We found comfort in each other. You left me, Amy.” He stared at her.

  She wiped her tears. “John, I left you to get help!” She leaned against the wall. “I’ve battled with alcohol since I was a teenager, and my parents put me in rehab, and I was clean until last year.”

  “Really? ’Cause your parents had no idea you were an alcoholic.” He glared at her.

  “You told my parents.” Her eyes got big.

  “What did you want me to tell them when they asked for you?” He placed his hands in his pockets. “What happened to make you start drinking?”

  She wip
ed her tears. “I guess I couldn’t handle the stress from work, being a mother and wife. The abortion…”

  “Why didn’t you come to me?” He made his voice soft. “I asked you over and over."

  She stared at him. “I didn’t trust our love, but I do now.”

  “Sickness or not, you cheated on me multiple times.”

  Amy came up to him. “You cheated on me too, but I forgive you.” She grabbed his hand.

  “You abandoned me.” He pulled his hand away. “Your actions were what caused that ripple effect.”

  “Please don’t leave me for her,” she pleaded.

  “I’m not leaving you for anyone, but I can’t continue in this marriage after everything that’s happened. I don’t trust you and now you don’t trust me.”

  “I still trust you. She’s the one I don’t trust. I bet she couldn’t wait to seduce you.” She moved in front of him.

  He looked down in her brown eyes. “Sophia is one of the sweetest people I know. She didn’t seduce me. If anything, I seduced her.”

  “Why the hell would you seduce her, of all people?”

  “Why not? She was there when I needed someone.” He walked out of the room to check on his son. Johnny had finished eating and was now laughing, watching cartoons.

  “Do you love her?”

  “She’s a friend. I care about her.” He walked back in the room, knowing that Johnny was okay.

  She sat on the bed. “Tell her it’s over.”

  He turned and arched a brow. “We’re not having an affair.”

  “I don’t trust her. What lies did she tell you?”

  He looked at her suspiciously. “Was she supposed to tell me something?”

  She remained quiet.

  “You don’t have to worry about Sophia.” He yanked his shirt out of his pants.

  She wiped her tears, and smiled. “Come back home?”

  “Amy, while you were gone, I petitioned for full custody of Johnny, and we’re legally separated.” He stared at her, seeing the hurt in her eyes.

  “How could you stab me in the back? I’m your fucking wife!”

  He moved in front of her. “I tried everything to make you happy, to work out our problems, and all you did was spit in my face. Then you leave me a letter, instead of trusting me. I would’ve helped you, Amy. How many times did I offer? I loved you.”

  “I told you I was sick.”

  “And you’re not sick now?” he yelled.

  “You’re not getting away with this. You can’t just take my son.”

  “You abandoned us.”

  She snatched his hand. “Please give me another chance to prove to you that I have changed.”

  “You don’t need to prove anything to me.” He walked out of the bedroom toward the back yard. He dug into his pocket and dialed her number. “Hey.”

  “John, I told you not to call me anymore.” Sophia spoke softly.

  “I know, but I wanted you to know I told Amy.”

  “I’m sorry…”

  “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

  “Kay blew up. She thought we were having an affair.”

  “Did you tell her we weren’t?”

  “Jason did, he had my back. Why didn’t you tell me you told him?”

  “I couldn’t lie to him anymore. He saw right through us.”

  “I’m leaving soon.”

  “Where to?”

  “John, we talked about this. I can’t tell you.”

  “I understand.” Except he really didn’t.

  She was silent.

  “Call me when you get where you’re going.”

  “John, I have to go.”

  “I promise everything is going to be okay.”

  “Bye, John.”

  “Sophia—” He didn’t want to hang up, knowing this was really goodbye and he remembered he’d never gotten the chance to tell her. “He won’t be able to hurt you. His parole was revoked.” But then he realized she was no longer on the phone. He called her back but the phone was turned off so it went straight to voicemail. “Sophia, I know you don’t want me to keep calling but you’ve got to know this. Terrell’s parole has been revoked.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  At the morning meeting, Amy shot daggers at Kay from across the conference room. Kay tried to ignore her glares, but it was starting to get on her nerves.

  The meeting was over, and the VP dismissed them all. Kay stood, ready to leave the room.

  “Kay,” Amy called out.

  She took a deep breath and turned. “Yes, Amy, how can I help you?”

  “You’ve been avoiding me.”

  “Have I?” Kay crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for the accusations.

  “You knew all this time.” She stood in front of her.

  There it was. “I knew what?”

  The last of the employees exited the conference room, leaving them alone.

  “Don’t play games with me.” Amy pointed her finger at her. “You knew Sophia was fucking my husband.” She glared at Kay.

  “Look, this is not the time or place to discuss this.”

  She lowered her finger. “You knew!” She raised her voice.

  “I didn’t know,” she said honestly.

  “You’re lying. I thought we were friends, but I now see whose side you’re on.” She placed her hand on her hip.

  Kay arched her eyebrow. “Actually, I’m not on anyone’s side. It’s none of my business what you, John, or Sophia do.”

  Amy’s lips got thin. “So what you’re saying is you condone adultery?”

  Kay shook her head. “Really, Amy, you have a lot of nerve to ask me that.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “You cheated on John first, and if you think about it, he didn’t cheat on you. You’d abandoned your family by then. But to answer your question, no. I don’t believe in adultery.” Kay went to walk away when Amy gripped her arm.

  “We’re not done.”

  Kay now stared at Amy dumbfounded, and pulled her arm away. “Yes, we absolutely are,” she snapped, and strode out of the conference room.

  ***

  John sat on a stool at Jimmy’s Bar near the law firm, staring at the bottom of his glass, thinking of everything that had happened over the last seven months. He was finally starting to feel like himself again, until Amy had come back.

  Someone placed a hand on his shoulder, taking him from his thoughts.

  “Everything okay?” Jason asked, sitting next to him.

  “Couldn’t be better,” he answered, still looking at the glass.

  Jason waved the bartender down and ordered a drink.

  John finally looked over at him, and chuckled. “Kay let you out to play.”

  “Whatever. Kay doesn’t tell me what I can and can’t do.” The bartender put his drink in front of him. “Our relationship is built on trust.”

  John grabbed his drink and gulped it down, and waved at the bartender again. “A bottle of water.”

  “Water?” Jason raised an eyebrow.

  “Yes. I do have to drive home.”

  Jason turned, shaking his head, and watched him. “How do you feel about Sophia leaving, and don’t deny that you have feelings for her.”

  He opened the bottle of water. “Sophia is—I mean was—my friend. That’s all.”

  “She’s not your friend anymore?” Jason asked, surprised. “Did Amy tell you she doesn’t want you around her anymore?”

  John took a sip of water. “Are you crazy? Amy can’t tell me shit. It was Sophia’s decision and I’m respecting it.”

  “Are you really?” Jason asked. “You guys became very close while Amy was gone.”

  “I miss her, but this is the way it has to be.” He turned, making sure Jason couldn’t see the emotion on his face. “After I told Amy I slept with Sophia, she’s been trying so hard to win me back.”

  “Are you thinking of giving your wife another chance?”

  “Honestly, I don
’t want to. I won’t ever be able to trust her, but I’m thinking about it because of my son, and only because of him.”

  “Dude, if she doesn’t make you happy anymore, you need to let her go.” Jason put his hand on his shoulder.

  “You were the one who told me I should stay in my marriage.” John stared at him.

  “I was wrong. You can’t help who you love.” Jason took a sip of his drink. “Don’t get me wrong, I don’t condone cheating, but you both passed that line. I don’t care what you say, or maybe you haven’t admitted it to yourself yet, but you do have feelings for Sophia. Whatever you and Sophia had was much more than physical, and that’s when you passed that line.”

  John drank his water, listening to his friend speak the truth.

  “If you do return to Amy, you better make sure you think long and hard about that decision. Is she really the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, after all is said and done?”

  Jason was making him think, and then he spoke. “I would sacrifice myself for my son any day.”

  “If you’re not happy, Johnny will feed from that. If you’re happy, your son will eventually be happy too.”

  “Who made you Dr. Phil?” They both laughed, and his cell rang. He dug into his pocket and looked at the screen. It was Jerome.

  Before he could speak, Jerome grunted. “It’s another girl.”

  John started laughing. “Congratulations, man.” He turned to Jason. “Jerome had another girl.”

  “Damn, another girl! Tell him I said congratulations.” Jason grabbed his wallet, pulled out some bills, and placed them on the counter.

  “Tell Jenny congratulations.”

  “I will,” Jerome said, just before he hung up.

  I wonder if our baby was a girl, thought John.

  Jason stood. “It’s getting late. Time to go home.”

  John stood too, placing his cell in his pocket. “Kay called, huh?” he chuckled.

  “Whatever,” Jason said.

  They both walked out of the bar to their separate cars.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  John sat at the Rivera Restaurant waiting for Amy to arrive. He’d decided to sit down and talk to her about their relationship. If she really had been sick, she might deserve another chance. Amy entered the restaurant looking beautiful. Her hair was down, and she wore his favorite blue dress. Their eyes met but he didn’t see the once-familiar spark in her eyes.